The World Watches Hetalia
by Maelstrom Alert
Summary: What happens when Sealand and Wy discover Hetalia at a World Meeting, and everyone watches it? Follow the nations as they discover everyone's secrets and some other stuff. Warning: Contains language. Oh, and Romano. Rated T just in case.
1. Chapter 1 - Intro

It was the day of the World Meeting. Everyone, surprisingly, was there. And by everyone, yes, all the micronations were there too. Sealand and Wy were sitting at a table in a spare conference room, searching up random stuff on New Zealand's laptop. Suddenly, Sealand stood up.

"Hey, look, Wy! There are pictures of us!" Giggling, they both kept looking at the search results.

Two pairs of eyes widened as they saw the last link that was being shown on the section of the page.

"Hetalia?"

(〃^∇^)ﾉ

Sealand and Wy bolted down the hallway until they reached where all the other countries were, laptop in Wy's arms. Skidding into the room, they discovered, oddly enough, that everyone was having a tea time.

Clearing his throat, England stood up. "Um, Sealand, Wy, may you please leave the room?" He was taken aback as they both shouted "NO!" at the same time.

"Alright, fine, what do you guys want?" he muttered as he sat back down.

Wy went and stood at the head of the table by Germany. "Sir, permission to talk?" she asked him. He nodded in confirmation and she slammed the laptop onto the table. Everyone jumped, and the people who were still talking shut up immediately.

"Alright, I want to show you guys this, so this'll hopefully be short and to the point," said Wy, letting Sealand join her at the front. "So Sealand and I were just searching stuff up on NZ's laptop, and then we came across this thing," she paused for effect, "called Hetalia: Axis Powers."

Wy paused again to let it sink in. Several confused noises were made, and Japan let out an "Oh!" Everyone stared at him, and he looked embarrassed. "It was made in my country," he explained. "I haven't rearry heard about it that much, but I know it exists."

The two micronations nodded in confirmation. "Anyways, so we watched the first episode of it, and let's just say we found some REALLY interesting stuff about it, us, and Germany's mental health," Wy stated boldly.

Everyone started giggling as Germany's face grew red. "Excuse me?" he demanded.

"Yeah, you were talking about feeding a s- Mmph!" Sealand started, but Wy was soon there, covering his mouth. The Australian micronation rolled her eyes. "Shut up, no spoilers remember? Anyways, so we want to display the video on the pull-down screen. With sound, of course. So, how are we going to do that?"

New Zealand pointed to a laptop sitting on the other end of the table. "You could do it there," he offered. Sealand cheered and ran towards the computer. After pulling the episode up and turning on the displayer thing on the ceiling, Wy hit play and their lives changed forever. And possibly their minds.


	2. Chapter 2 - Episode 1

**A/N: Ugh, that took forever, and now my back hurts. Anyways! Here's the non-awaited chapter, I hope you enjoy!**

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Everyone stared in shock as America's face appeared on the screen. "Dude, I think the World Conference can convene. Solving all of today's problems by talking excessively!" Everyone cheered as Belgium's face came next.

"No matter how hard it seems, we can fix anything with enough meetings and photo ops." Spain laughed as he saw himself.

"Feel free to speak honestly while protecting your chances for re-election." Everyone burst out laughing as Sweden and Finland came onto the screen.

"Hey Svi, makeover much?!" yelled Denmark. The former glared at everyone in the room.

"I'll go first! About that whole using global warming to enslave humanity thing, I think we'll be okay if we genetically engineer a huge hero and have him protect the Earth - I give you the super hero, 'Globoman'!" America's face lit up. "Hey, I did say that, remember?"

There was a weird whistling noise as Japan appeared. "I agree with America." The camera shifted over to an angered Switzerland, who slammed his hand onto the table. "Man up or I'll beat you with my peace prize!" he yelled, glaring. Everyone chuckled as the camera switched to England.

"There's no way some hero will help global warming or humanity's enslavement," he objected, but before anybody could say anything else, France appeared.

"If Britain and America don't agree, how can I be superior by dissing them both?" asked France on the screen, with England popping up afterwards yelling "AGINCOURT!"

There was an immediate uproar to this, as everyone started yelling about "How England was England, not Britain". Wy had to pause the video as Germany tried to calm everyone down.

When at last, nobody else was talking, Sealand pipped up, "Let's continue!"

"You Frenchies just love to hate America. Why not go back to making us hot green chick statues like you used to?" suggested America, prodding France in the head with his pen. "Ever since we lost our status as a world super power, condescending superiority and wine are all we have left," replied France.

"Don't be so hard on yourself. You still have mimes and body odor," responded England cheekily.

The present-day France spewed some tea out of his nose. "Excuse me?!" he shouted.

Wy cleared her throat nervously. "Continuing on!"

"Western nations are so immature. I doubt they ever grow up. Maybe I can try appealing to the only organ of theirs that seems to work. Would you guys like to sample some Chinese tasty treats?" offered China, holding up a basket of the said foods. All the Asian countries face-palmed with the exception of South Korea, who yelled, "Chinese tasty treats were made in Korea, da-ze!" The outburst only provoked most of the other attenders of the meeting to face-palm, as well.

Sweden glared around, still obviously annoyed about the make-over thing, and made everyone be quiet. He grunted and Sealand continued the paused video.

"We'd just get hungry again!" shouted England and France, before starting to fight again.

The scene changed to Spain gliding smoothly over to Russia. 'Hey, why don't you say something Russia? They'll stop fighting if you go over and step in."

Russia turned. "What? Why me? No thanks."

The scene changed again to show a nervous looking Lithuania. "I want to see Lithuania get in big trouble and come crawling back for help."

Next showed a crying Latvia in a chair with Belarus holding a blade to the poor boy's back. "Then Latvia will be right behind."

Estonia had his chin in his hand, looking smug. "You're so tough, next you'll try to pick a fight with Haiti," he said sarcastically. Haiti snickered.

Russia smiled at him. "Do you have a miniature detachable head?" he asked innocently.

Poland appeared next, standing in front of Lithuania with his hand out. "If you come any closer to Lithuania, I'll be forced to get Lech Wałęsa and go all Solidarność on you!"

Greece was then shown sleeping, completely oblivious to the pandemonium around him.

Someone started yelling, and then China was heard going "Please everyone, calm down!".

"EVERYONE SHUT UP!" roared Germany, slapping the table in annoyance.

"Germany!?" said France and England at the same time.

"We've called this conference to solve the world's problems, not to fight about the problems of our past. And since I'm the only country who seems to know how to run a meeting, we'll follow my rules from here on out. Eight minutes each for speeches, no chit chat about side deals, and absolutely no going over the time limit. Now if you want to go, make sure you're prepared and raise your hand, but do so in a way that does not mock any salute of my country's past."

A little hand wavered up slowly with sound effects to go with it.

Germany pointed to Italy. "Germany recognizes his friend Italy."

Italy, for once, opened his eyes. Sparkling effects were heard. The Italian stretched out his hand before saying, "PASTAAAAA!~"

Everyone applauded as the music for the opening theme started.

"It's not done yet, bozos," said Wy, rolling her eyes.

"It is said that long ago in this land, there lived a man who conquered the Mediterranean Sea, and gained all the world's wealth. His name… Was the Roman Empire," Germany narrated. Italy squealed as the name was said, nudging his brother and whispering, "That's our grandfather!"

Romano rolled his eyes. "No shit," he stated.

"He had it all. The world's wealth, and fame, and vast land. The man who gained everything, one day, he just… Disappeared." Italy sobbed. "Grandpa Rome, no!" Romano slapped his brother.

"Later, during World War One!" proclaimed Germany.

"I'm supposed to be fighting a descendant of Rome right now," said Germany to himself. "But so far, no such luck." He looked to the side.

"How weird. We crossed that border with no problem, didn't we, Herr Stick?" he asked the stick. "I'm so sorry I didn't share any of my liver wurst with you," he murmured, gazing at the stick sadly. "The invasion was going so well I forgot about feeding mein schticky friend!"

Wy lunged for the pause button, and kind of just let the words sink in. All of the nations burst out laughing. Even Sweden and Japan managed a small smile. Prussia was rolling on the floor, literally shrieking. "Germany!" he howled, uncontrollably shaking. "HAHAHAHA!" Soon, the room was just a chaotic mess as they laughed and giggled.

Germany blushed profusely. "Sh-shut up! I was lonely, alright?"

The statement only made them all laugh harder, with the exception of Russia. "Maybe I could be your friend, da?" he asked, smiling. "Then you shall become one with Mother Russia!"

"Anyways…" Sealand said awkwardly. He continued the video.

"I still shouldn't let my guard down. It's him we're talking about, he must have some sort of plan." He stopped walking and gasped.

In the clearing was… A box of tomatoes. Germany was shocked, and could only gasp some more and stare.

Then, there came the words, "To be continued."

A Chibitalia floated across the screen and plopped down, followed by a pink bunny, Hungary, Spain, Austria, Holy Roman Empire, France and a big brown dog. Said countries gasped in surprise as their chibis were shown.

"Chibitalia," chorused the children together.

"Is everyone listening?" asked the narrator. All of the nations jolted in surprise. "Once upon a time, in a house called the Roman Empire," Italy was shown in the scene, saying: "It's next to my big brother France's house!" in a cute voice.

"Aww!" went France. "Shut up, you bloody wanker!" was quickly followed.

"The newborn Italy lived with various different countries." France and Holy Roman Empire bounced next to him. "But one day, Italy's grandfather took him away, and forced him to leave his home and friends."

Italy's princess drawing appeared, and everyone snorted.

"For a while, Italy spent his time drawing and singing with his unusually handsome grandfather. Italy had a natural affinity for artistic pursuits, so his grandfather was delighted." Somewhere in the back, Romano huffed in jealousy.

"It's fun to draw pictures. Somehow I feel so Renaissance," said Chibitalia in his cute voice. "I want to show my beautiful drawings to my big brothers France, and the Roman Empire. And that other big brother whose name I don't know because I haven't met him yet." Romano huffed again, because it was obviously him. "I can't wait to see everyone!"

"Unfortunately, when he met them again…" the narrator started.

"You must become part of the Roman Empire-" "Fratello? You're a twerp compared to me!"

"They had all become assholes." Romano and France yelled their objections. "Hey!" shouted Romano. "Hey!" shouted France.

Suddenly, Holy Roman Empire was chasing Chibitalia. "Stop! I want you to become part of the Holy Roman Empire! No! Please!" cried the said person, chasing after the poor Italy. Italy sobbed in fear, running away.

And with that, Marukaite Chikyuu started playing. Wy grumbled and paused the song.

All the countries started talking amongst themselves, the most common question being:

"What WAS that!?"

Suddenly, America stood up. "Being the hero, I've decided something."

"Oh? What's that? That your brain is the size of a pea?" snarked England.

"Oh, nah!" America responded cheerfully. "I gave up trying to find out how big my brain was two weeks ago. What I meant to say is… Let's keep watching it!" They all cheered and with that, Sealand clicked 'Next Episode".


	3. Chapter 3 - Episode 2

**A/N: Blaaaargh. Every time I update this, it seems that my back hurts. Ah, well.**

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"The time was World War One," said Germany's voice again "I've found myself in what you'd call a "situation"."

He stalked up to the tomato box. "Hm… Weird… Why has someone left me these tomatoes…" he tapped the box with his stick, and at once a cry was let out from the box. He leaped back, yelling.

Germany warily hung back as the box started talking and sweating. "Hello to you! I am the box of tomatoes fairy! I come in peace! Let us be friends and play with each other!" A giggle rose up from the watchers.

"I think someone's inside-!" said Germany, grabbing the box and trying to pry it open.

"You're wrooooong! There's no one inside! Do not open the box!" the box pleaded.

"Dammit...this is heavy...!" choked out Germany as he tried opening it.

"Why are you ignoring me? What point is it to try to see the box of tomatoes fairy's god?" asked the box, obviously nervous.

"_There's something distraught in here...!"_ thought Germany giving one last burst of strength and falling backwards to the ground.

At once, Italy Veneziano sprang out from it, sobbing.

_"_AAH! I'm so sorry, you were right! I am not the box of tomatoes fairies at all! It was all lies! Lies! Lies!" Germany stuck his head out from under the box's lid, shocked.

Italy continued wailing as he stood in the box. "Please don't shoot me, I'm too young to die! And what if I don't die, but I'm just mortally wounded and forced to lie there in misery in a pool of my own blood!? Please, I'll do anything! Well, I mean within reason! I DON'T WANT TO DIE!"

With that last statement, the scene zoomed out to a mountainous landscape as several countries laughed.

Then, the opening theme started playing.

Italy was still in the box, rambling on and on, as Germany stood helplessly by. "I mean, seriously, I'm a virgin! Where do you think they get virgin olive oil? The point is you do not want to shoot the virgin! We're pathetic enough as it is! I apologize for the lying and the boxing! I really am a good Italy! I have relatives in Germany, right?" His other words were drowned out by Germany's thoughts.

_Uggh...is this the guy I'm supposed to be fighting? I heard mein feind is a descendent of the great Rome, but...ugh! _

He pulled Italy out of the box by the back of his uniform. _There's no way this very little brat could be the same enemy. I wonder who he really is._

Tears sprayed everywhere as Germany inquired Italy.

"Let me ask you a question. You wouldn't by chance be related to the great Rome, would you?"

As soon as he asked that, Italy stopped his waterworks. "Wait, you're telling me you know Grandpa Rome? What a fantastical turn of events! Especially for this poor pizza and pasta lover! You had me completely fooled! I thought you were really mean and scary! So we can be friends, okay?" he asked, obviously relieved.

_What kind of a joke is this? _Suddenly, Germany gasped.

_Mein kampf, this is a trap! _He scooted away from Italy as fast as possible, with the latter still wearing his goofy smile on his face.

_He's pretending to be harmless in an attempt to catch me off guard! Sneaky bastard!_

_"_How fun to have a new friend-AAGH!" The Italian was cut off as Germany slammed the butt of his rifle into Italy's face.

"I will not be tricked! Go to hell, you pasta-loving trottle!" yelled Germany.

Italy lay squirming on the ground, wailing helplessly. Romano laughed. "Haha, you lame, weak bastard!"

_At that moment...I never imagined the extent to which this encounter would change my fate...although I do not believe in such things._

_To be continued…_

"Chibitalia," said the kids again.

"Hey, you know what, 'oly Rome? There are other people around you to chase besides Italy!" said a young France, holding up one finger.

Chibitalia and Holy Roman Empire slid onto the screen. "He chases me because I'm scared of him..." said Chibitalia sadly.

Holy Rome glared. "I would quit if you'd just come over to my place, so..." he trailed off.

Chibitalia looked down, guilty. "But Grandpa told me I'm not supposed to go."

"Then I'll make you!" declared Holy Rome, dragging the poor chibi off by his feet, kicking and weeping.

"Did you hear a word I said to you!?" demanded an angry France. "Ha," snorted England.

"WRRRRAAAAAH!" cried Holy Rome, turning and glaring.

"HAAAAAAAH!" went France, his cloak fluttering in the non-existent wind.

"Ho ho ho ho...!" he chuckled, unsheathing his sword.

Chibitalia turned and saw a sparkling Spain. "Just ignore them, you would like to have some churros, no?" offered Spain.

The former brightened immediately, falling in the spell of the magical churros. "Si!" he cried out happily.

Spain grinned. Romano pouted. Italy wanted some pasta. Everyone else looked at Spain.

"How Italy became a victim of bullying," a kid stated.

A map of Italy came onto the screen, with growing pictures of Chibitalia and Chibiromano. "After Rome died, Italy became an assembly of small countries," explained the narrator.

A picture of the Italy brothers was shown, Chibitalia painting and Chibiromano holding a basket of fruits. For some reason, Chibiromano didn't have his curl. The present-day one groaned and face-palmed.

"In those days, Italy had everything. Fertile land, mild weather, and a rich history full of art and religion. It was a rather attractive country. Naturally, the other countries started to get jealous," continued the narrator.

"However, Italy was weak." As the words appeared, both of the Italys looked very offended. They were even more offended when the next words appeared. "Even back then, it was weak."

Wy paused the video, and everyone turned and stared at the laughing Spain. "Fusososososo~" he said, using his "cheer-up charm".

Sealand coughed, and straightened up. He unpaused it.

Soon, there was a picture of a square of Spain, Austria, Holy Roman Empire, and France, kicking the Italian brothers around. "To those guys, no land was as good as prey as Italy. France started the nasty trend by charging into Italy first, then other strong and incredibly rude countries invaded from the sea and took pieces of Italy for themselves."

"And once again the time was World War One," read the caption. Bulgaria laughed.

Germany stared at the sleeping Italy. _So I captured Italy, but the only thing I hear from him is the singing or the laughing with weird accents. It's like he doesn't want to escape from me at all._

"Why don't you try to escape?" asked Germany.

Italy sprang up, flowers and glitter surrounding him. "Why? As long as I'm with you, I get fed and nobody picks on me. I like being here."

Germany started shouting, obviously angry. "Nein! That attitude is unacceptable! If you're a soldier, and even if you're French, you're supposed to try very hard to escape captivity!" France let out a noise of indignation. England snickered again.

Italy was laying at the bottom of the screen, with the words "Sprawling" next to him. "That's the most pathetic excuse for a country I've ever seen! Are you sleeping at me right now!?" continued Germany.

The door creaked open. "Hey, look at how the door just opened. You could totally run away if you wanted to."

Italy floated lazily out the door. Germany turned to watch him go. Soon, the talking of Italy and the giggling of some girls followed. Germany peered out of the door opening.

Italy was standing right outside the building, flirting and chatting with a couple of girls. "Ciao, ladies, you're all so lovely! Where are you headed? Macaroni bucatini tortellini ravioli, cannelloni fettucine linguini, Luigi Mario..."

Germany stuck his head back in as Italy wandered in again.

Sealand stopped the song as Marukaite Chikyuu started.

"Well, onto the next one, I suppose!" said Italy cheerfully.


	4. Chapter 4 - Episode 3

**A/N: Thanks for all the reviews, favorites, and follows! They make me happy!**  
***eats all of them* OMNOMNOMNOM**

**Guest: Thank you! ^u^  
LadyGlitchy aka Guest: Yep, and hopefully, when I get to it, the season 5 dub will be out...  
**

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"Hey Germany, come listen, I wrote a song especially for you," said Italy, holding a guitar in his left hand. The present-day Japan and Hungary squealed in delight, before covering their faces in embarrassment while blushing. "Stop thinking perverted thoughts!" shouted Switzerland, firing his rifle at the ceiling. "Hey! Sod off, you bloody wanker! And stop ruining my ceiling!" England yelled. France and Scotland started sniggering, before Australia put them in a headlock. "No one insults my mummy!"

Soon, the room was in a chaos. China peeked over at the computer screen. "Seriously? We haven't even gotten through the first 4 seconds, and we're already fighting. Aiya, young nations these days…" He shook his head sadly.

Suddenly, everything stopped as an ominous sound was heard. The three Baltics started quivering; this sound was VERY familiar to them. "Kolkolkolkolkol…" Russia loomed above everybody. Except Sweden.

Prussia literally let out a whimper and bashed at the keyboard, trying to continue the video.

"What? Even though I'm your enemy? Okay, let me hear it," replied Germany.

Italy started strumming his guitar.

"_Germany, Germany, Germany is a really really nice place~ _

_Even though I'm your prisoner, you give me food, and it doesn't suck like English food,~ " _

At this point, England let out a pitiful noise.

_"Sausages with cheese, always taste so goooood!~ _

_It'd be heaven for a dog, yeah, that's Germany~ _

_Tell me, how is it you Germans are so robust, you're crushing me with your intimidation~ _

_My fragility causes me to openly weep out of fear, your women terrify me~ _

_Is it the norm to drink a barrel of beer and then bust it on somebody's head?~ _

_Please don't come to my place in large mobs~ (German tourists are scary!)_

_Even the girls that are from Germany, are more rugged than I am~ _

_Yahoo!"_

A picture of a box was shown dancing to the music. "Welcome home, Italy," greeted a man, presumably his boss.

Egypt reached over and pressed the pause button right as the intro started. Hungary was sobbing into her sleeves, while Romania and Prussia (who had gotten over his traumatizing experience earlier) poked her repeatedly with forks. "Kesesesese!~" crowed Prussia, wildly brandishing some broccoli that appeared out of nowhere.

Germany and Italy stared at everyone, and everyone stared back. "Uhh…" Germany started. Everyone cracked up.

The intro continued playing.

"Ohonhonhonhonhonhon," sniggered an evil-looking France. Germany was below him, looking distressed. "In my opinion, France already lost his wars, they shouldn't be allowed to pay them so much money!"

Wy stopped the video for them to read the words. A cuckoo clock appeared behind them. 2 more followed, then came a weird one… Which France's head popped out of, to the disbelief of everyone. Then two more regular ones were next.

"Day after day, I was forced to make cuckoo clocks. Then we sell them, but we have to give all the money to France! Ugh! I'm going crazy! Well, at least I'm rid of Italy now."

With a _sproing_, Italy floated across the screen behind Germany.

"It's the only thing about all these," the nations didn't catch this, "that makes it bearable. He was a strange country. I utterly refuse to be his babysitter anymore!" Italy floated down from the ceiling. Romano face-palmed in defeat.

"Ja," said Germany, straightening up with a serene air around him. "This time that I've been able to spend by myself is supreme bliss." For once, he was smiling.

"Germany! Help me find a job! My family has become extremely poor!"

Italy appeared. Germany was still smiling and sparkling, and then suddenly, Germany literally kicked him out of the house.

"KYAAAAA!"

"Don't come bothering me about a job, I can't do anything except work all day to repay France!" shouted Germany, working more furiously now.

"Wait, please hear me out!" He said something else that the countries didn't hear correctly. "Back home, there's no place to work, no place to eat, I don't care if the job pays next to nothing, I just want to work! Even if I could get _some_ money, even just a little bit, that's better than nothing! Please, you could find something for me!" Italy sobbed, peering in through the window.

Germany turned with a sympathetic look on his face. "Oh Italy…"

There was a timeskip, which then showed Italy happily hammering some cuckoo clocks. Some people giggled.

_Dear big brother,_

_I started a job where I make money at Germany's house! I get paid 9 hundred million marks per day! I know, right? But don't get excited, because one egg costs 3.2 billion marks so it's all just a month of work._

Romano grumbled. "I remember that letter…"

"Time passed, and then it became World War 2," read the caption.

"Our German troops are unshtoppable!" a funny-sounding voice yelled from the television. It rambled on until no one could tell what it said. An obviously very pissed Italy stood in front of it with his arms folded.

"I can't believe Mr. Germany is attacking France again and it's like he's got a grudge against big brother!" fumed Italy. Germany and France awkwardly stared at each other.

"If our troops can keep this up, I'll have France making _me_ cuckoo clocks in no time!"

"Ah, Germany, I have some terrible news!" a German cried. "Italy become Germany's ally! WHAT ARE WE SUPPOSED TO DO?!" he wailed. Germany just stood there, horrified to the point of no words.

Germany sulked in the room as flowers erupted all around Italy. "Germany! I pledged my undying support to your cause. We'll be best friends, then-"

He got kicked out again. "KYAAAAAA!" he screamed.

Suddenly, he came flying back and hit the house. "Luxembourg kicked my ass and sent me back here-"

Said nation and Belgium cheered.

Germany interrupted him. "Get away from me, I don't need your help!"

"Come on, Mr. Germany, you can be my friend, can't you? We'll be an alliance! I've always been ruled by somebody since forever! You'll be my strong, big brother. You can order me around, and I'll disappoint you!" offered Italy.

Germany turned with a blush, considering the offer.

"When I'm near destruction, you can swoop in and save me! And when you need cannon fodder, I'll be there to marginally obey the command!"

"Friends," murmured Germany, still blushing. "That sounds… Nice. Since I've never had friends, I'll likely treat you badly. But someone has to take it."

Next showed a picture of Germany and Italy, arm in arm, standing under a bright sun. "This could work. Friends. Err… We don't have to kiss, do we?" asked Germany.

"Nope!" replied Italy. "Unless you want to." Hungary slumped back in a dead faint with a nosebleed. Romania and Prussia giggled and resumed their poking. Romano slapped his brother repeatedly. "Damn you, fratello! You fucking betrayed me!" Italy sobbed as Germany, quote, swooped in to save him.

"In this way the two countries formed an alliance. However…" Austria read aloud. "In the end…"

Ominous music was heard.

"Germany. Thanks for the water!" Italy raised a pot. "Now I can make pasta again!" He was so happy, he had tears in his eyes.

"Stop wasting water," scolded Germany. "I'm not sure anyone would believe me that you died making pasta in the desert."

"Germany's stomachache just kept getting worse," read Austria again.

For the first time, the Hetalia sign appeared. A chibi Italy popped up, saying "Hetalia."

Soothing music was then played, with the figure of Japan with his back to the camera. He turned. "I am very preased to meet you," he greeted.

Marukaite Chikyuu started playing, and for once, they all started talking over it.

Belgium pulled up episode 4.

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**A/N: Horry sheet, that took forever. Anyways, since I'm lazy, this was late. Sorry. Um. Yeah. My humor is turning rusty... And these chapters keep getting shorter and shorter, eh. **

**~Maelstrom**


	5. Chapter 5 - Episode 4

**A/N: The word count keeps going down XD.** **It's 1649 - 1396 - 1408 - 1405.** **Oh well.**

**Guest 1: Aw, I think England's gonna break down crying... And then Spain would start cooing over Chibiromano...**

**Guest 2: *salutes* I'll try to update more!**

**Guest 3: Thank you!**

**Thank you, everybody, for the kind and motivational reviews! Love y'all! (I live in Texas, okay. It's rubbed off on me. And I don't mean the glasses.**

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Japan was back. "Konnichiwa. I am Japan. I enjoy sensing the mood and refraining from speaking."

Germany was on the screen, very cheerful. "It's true! Okay, so I brought someone who will be our new ally."

"Do you speak of Italy? Alright, I am in agreement." Japan raised his head. "Although I am curious."

The camera switched to a giggling Italy, surrounded by three Japanese girls. "He surely is not the obviously suspicious character over there, is he?" wondered Japan. "I don't want to believe it either, but that's him," sighed Germany. A man popped out, saying "Improper!"

The Axis Powers were at a kotatsu table, with Germany reading a book, Japan signing a document, and Italy sleeping with a cat beside him. Japan reached down and put an orange on Italy's head. The cat mewled. Greece raised his head from his nap briefly to coo at it. "Kitty!" he said, before falling asleep again.

"I have signed the paperwork, but he appears to be sleeping," commented Japan.

"Ja, that is kind of his thing," agreed Germany, not looking up from his book. The cat mewled again.

"September 1940. The Tripartite Pack among Japan, Germany, and Italy was signed. Of course, they didn't sign while getting warm under a kotatsu table," read Austria for the screen. Prussia jeered. "Oh hey, unawesome aristocrat, that's like your job now, huh? How not very awesome!" he drawled out.

The opening theme started.

Germany turned dramatically. "Now Japan, do you think you could make U-Boats using those blueprints we had from the other day?"

"Well, I think your design is much too big to do in my home, but please do not worry. We succeeded in miniaturizing it using technology."

Germany was shocked. "No way!"

"U-Boat – You Can Choice It," read Austria.

"We have twelve color, random assortment. And we shall release new, additional colors to match each season. A popular voice actress will advertise it for us too," explained Japan.

A giant robot rose up. "And that is its final form."

"This is wunderbar!" Germany exclaimed. A man looked distressed.

Veneziano and Japan were in a hot spring. "Ciao, Japan! Guess what I heard! Germany said you were good at miniaturizing! Do you think you could shrink me too?"

Japan looked away. "Apologies, but no, we are not currently accepting orders to shrink Italias-"

Italy cut him off. "You shrank it! Your thing!"

"Japanese people grow, not show off." All of the nations except for the Axis were bewildered as the pounding of a hammer started. "Wow! What is this! Stupendo! Amazing! Wooooow!"

Romano could only stare. "WHAT."

"Chibitalia," sighed Austria, glaring at Prussia.

"Oh no, I wonder what happened. Mister Spain isn't his usual cheerful self," said the narrator. Spain looked angry. "What! Mister! I was hardly even 16 at that time!" Romano snickered.

"Big brother Spain looks lonely," murmured Chibitalia. "Hey, what happened! What's wrong with you, fratello?" called Chibitalia.

"Hola, mi hermano," greeted Spain, his eyes downcast. "Let me give to you some advice. You should go do all the things that you desire as soon as possible."

"Eh… Why do you say that?" asked Chibitalia.

Turns out, underneath the cliff Spain was sitting on, there was Austria and France, fighting. Spain had a sign attached to his back.

"Hapsburg Territory," read Austria smugly. Prussia and Spain glowered at him.

"Don't worry. You will find out soon enough," replied Spain.

Austria raised a hand, the army behind him cheering. He was holding Italy by the back of the poor girl-boy's outfit. "Oh yes I get it now," Chibitalia sighed.

"The Italian Wars," said a little kid. There was a picture of Austria holding Chibitalia by the back of his outfit again, but this time stepping on Chibiromano's head. "The Italian Wars, 1522-1544," was the caption. Italy and Romano cried. They remembered that time. Hungary slapped Austria's arm.

"During the Italian Wars, all of Italy was victimized. It was beaten up by rude little countries here and there, and was eventually sold piece by piece to the real bullies, the powerful countries. It wasn't long before young master Italy began his new life as a suffering underling," narrated the narrator.

Chibitalia was weeping in front of Austria. "Alright Italy, you belong to me, Austria. So suck it up. Your new job is to serve me and do what I say, do you understand?"

Austria, like Germany, turned dramatically. "Now then, I'll supervise all of the industry and politics in your land. The only thing you have to do is loyally obey me without asking any questions. Do you have any questions for me?" asked Austria. Prussia and Romania scoffed. Portugal and Chile snickered as well.

"Eh… Just-a one," admitted Chibitalia. "By any chance, do you serve pasta her-" he started hopefully.

"No we don't." Austria cut him off. Romano, Romania, Prussia, and Hungary gaped. "Wow, who knew you were such a cold-assed sadist back them?" wondered Romano.

"This Asian country has become a great power in such a short amount of time," thought Germany, strolling through the streets. "It's hard to think Japan was closed off to the world only sixty years ago," he continued. "He's a little naïve, but he's hard-working, honest, and knows many different whale recipes."

At this point, America gasped in horror. "G-Germany… I never knew that you, of all countries…!"

England glared at him. "Well, you hypocrite, you could at least remember what your country did to the Right whale and the Atlantic Gray whale," he commented snarkily.

America gasped again. "W-Why you-!"

"He senses the mood, and refrains from speaking. He's not half bad."

Japan looked at him and smiled. "I'll think about it. Perhaps next time. We shall see. I always say no. It's a quirk." All of the countries except for China and Japan himself were completely confused. Both of the Asian counties nodded simultaneously.

Germany's face looked grim. "His name is Japan. He's rather mysterious. And then there's that one." He glared to the left. Italy wad there, happily smiling with not a care in the world. "All he does is follow me around all the damn time."

Italy kept giggling like he always did (which was like a little schoolgirl), before raising his hand and crying, "PASTA!"

"And then there's that one…" sighed Germany ruefully. "And then there's that one."

"To be continued maybe," said a child quickly.

"Ciao, it's Italy!" shouted the said person, running in the ocean with a crab on his head. "We're in the middle of World War Two! By we, I mean Germany, Japan, and me! We're all part of the Tripartite Pact!"

There was a picture of the Allies. They glared at each other heatedly as they appeared on the screen with a diagram. (Complete with offensive and secret-revealing labels!)

America had an arrow pointing to England. 'Annoying. Already prepared strategies against England'.

England's arrow to France said 'Fighting each other to the death since birth' and 'Can't cooperate'.

England's to Russia said 'Why, you!"

Russia's to China said 'Holds grudge over having their southward expansion stopped'.

China's to England was simple and cruel. 'Opium War', it said. China dropped his gaze.

There was a sand pasta dish. "And we drifted to a southern island to take a little vacation-a. Wow, we dragged into drama after drama! It was crazy! What's going to happen to us? Find out IN THE NEXT EPISODE OF HETALIA! CRYING OUT SOS AT THE CENTER OF THE WORLD! Hasta la pasta!" cried Italy. He was shocked. "UM."

Germany shrugged. "I remember you randomly called that out during a G8 meeting," he recalled, shrugging.

Snickering, Prussia opened up the next episode.


End file.
